culture/tradition Lessons from Experiences Series Uncategorized

Thoughts on Loneliness 4

It is hard for introverts to explain situations, especially the ones who are naturally taciturn. They have the loudest minds, act little, and prefer to be left alone. I know a friend back in school who talks very little. It seemed he counted his words, and one day, a classmate lied against him. He was punished for what he didn’t commit. Why? He couldn’t explain himself!

I have some introverted friends; they can be very creative, unique, and intelligent. Maneva is an excellent example of a friend who says little but thinks and dreams big! She doesn’t show off, though she is smart and won’t tolerate noisy attitude and dominance from anyone. She prefers to do things her way. But when relaxed, you will enjoy the company of this ‘rigid’ person.

So it is nice to allow people (friends, peers, colleagues, partners, wives, husbands, kids) to be themselves.

We may not be able to discern why people act the way they do, why they chose to be alone. If you find someone who doesn’t like talking much, help by giving them some space. Usually, such people have their time to talk. Be patient and move with their flow.


Thoughts: Friends or Foes?

In the storytelling world, it is believed that rodents in the house are the ones to inform rodents outside where the fish basket is hidden. This applies in real life. Only those who know or are close to you can harm you with the information they have about you.

Sometimes we feel betrayed and then hurt over what friends do/did. Well, no one is indeed perfect, but a real friend won’t put himself in a position to deliberately hurt you (It does happen, though, once in a while, but the magnitude is forgivable).

So how do we know a friend?

* In times of need: If someone can’t help you, it doesn’t make the person a foe. A friend goes beyond his comfort to make you comfortable. A friend is unselfish and wishes to serve you.

* Testimonies behind you: For instance, my best friend, Franklin, will always fight for me even when I was physically unavailable. The same with me. So the saying goes, you know your real friends when they talk about you in your absence.

* Friendship can’t be forced. It just happens. So you know when someone is a friend. It goes with some understanding, feelings, concern, mutual interest, and care.

* If you trust someone with your life, then the person is a friend. If you can let someone guard your food or house, then he/she holds a lot of trust space in your heart. For instance, a friend took another’s prison detention so that his friend could say a final goodbye to his family. He did come back to take his punishment and relieve his friend of it!

Though it seems normal to share gossips, personal details, and secrets with friends, it is wise to reduce the amount of personal information you give out. Info like bank ID details is unique and must be kept as such.